I know that I have kept you all out of the loop over the past month and for that I am very sorry. The last month has been the hardest of my life but then again I have also had some of the best things ever happen to me. 1st off let me just say Thank You so much for everything that everyone did for the Benefit Concert!! To come into that room and see all the support and love for me and my family was just amazing!! There was so much time and energy put into this for us by so many of you and my younger boys will forever talk about how awesome and fun it was. You all have my heart and all my love!! I have had the chance also this last months to be able to visit with some of my family that I have not had the chance to see. Some of which have been years others just months but still none the less missed very much!! I loved having my sister and my nieces and nephew here for a week. Unfortunately I was so sick I didn't get the chance to really visit with them but I love them so much and am so thankful that they were able to come for the visit. My brother also showed up, which was a surprised to me. He has been MIA for too long and believe me I gave him a good big sister lecture no matter how bad I felt. I am sure his 1st thought was "what the heck was I thinking coming to visit her when all I get is lectures" but it was only done in love and I am so glad that he made it here for a brief visit. I can't even begin to tell you how many family and friends showed up at the benefit concert that I haven't seen in so long. I am so glad you were all there and I hope I got to visit with each of you as you all are important to me! This last week I was able to go to North Carolina to visit with my Aunt, Uncle and cousins. Before this trip I really wasn't sure if I was going to be able to make it. My stomach had been so upset and to keep food down just hasn't been going very well. So getting on a plane and not having to run to the bathroom really scared me. I decided 2 days before that I really needed to make this trip. That I hadn't seen my cousins since they were little and I really didn't know if I would be feeling any better any time soon. So I sucked it up and got myself on the plane. I have to say I don't know how I managed to get there without getting sick but I did and I am so glad I did!! I really was hoping to be able visit more of North Carolina but all I could muster was hanging out at their home. We had such a wonderful time visiting & I don't think I ever talked so much. My cousin Amy has 2 of the sweetest daughters that I completely fell in love with. They had lots and lots of questions but that's one of the things I fell in love with. My cousin Josh is an amazing artist. He has hundreds of drawings that just completely blew me away with all the detail. Keep your eyes open for Joshua Fry...... You will be impressed!!! It was such a great visit. I am so thankful that I did go! I made it home without too many issues and was able to make it to the parking garage before I started getting sick. Poor Bladen, who wants to see this?
So onto what's been going on with my health. While I was going through brain radiation I started to get sicker and sicker. Just the thought of some foods made my stomach turn and then I got to a point where I just couldn't eat anything. Then a cough started and I knew that the cancer was growing again in my lungs. We started a different type of chemo and this knocked me flat on my back except when I am hanging over the toilet. I have never been so sick in my life! My stomach is upset, I am throwing up, I can't eat and my body just aches to my bones so much so that I can't stand anyone touching me. My Dr has decided to pull me off of the latest chemo as it is not working and I have had a 20% growth with the cancer in my lungs. Along with the coughing which has gotten so much worse and I am still needing to drain my lungs about every 3 weeks or so. I have had some pretty dark times over the last month and half. Not really knowing what is going on and seeming to just get worse every day. I have gone to another Dr now for a 2nd opinion. I will be starting an IV chemo plus a pill form of chemo next week. I will also be having a brain scan next week. My Dr wants to rule out that my stomach issues are not from something going on in my brain. She gave me a lot of new option and a ray of hope again. I have still been very sick but now I feel like I have something to look forward to and hopefully get back to life.
Over the past month I have not been able to spend the quality time that I would like with my boys. I have had to ask them to step up and really help me. I am so thankful for all my children and their willingness to always jump in and help me without any fight! With that being said I also want to thank you all so much for all the messages and comments over the last month. I am sorry that I haven't been able to always comment back or send an update but with everything that was going on I needed to shut down and just figure out what was going on with me. I cant unfortunately always answer every text or email message.. I know you all love me and it's just because you care but please know that I can't get back to everyone every time. I do have the Connie's Crew FB page if you would like to help with anything at all and one of the girls will get back to you with any of my needs. I couldn't get through this without all of you and your support and love. Thank you so much and I Love you! I promise that I will be updating my blog more often so you all know just whats going on.
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