Gammainized

    I am so thankful that the last few days are behind me! I had my 2nd round of Gamma Knife Radiation on Thur. & all though we did find 2 more tumors on the brain we did find them early enough to hopefully have them treated & shrinking with this treatment. I have to say this type of treatment is not for the faint at heart. I am so thankful for my dear friend Jennifer that has been there with me both times now & is willing to stand in front of this silly steel crown when they wheel it into the room just so I wont have to sit there & keep looking at it until they screw it into my head. I had forgotten in just a mere 5 mths how much pressure & pain there was with this procedure. All I remember from last time was hearing the screws being screwed into my scull but maybe because I have lost half of my hearing I didn't seem to hear it this time. My experience this time was more the pressure & pain & when the screw was tightened on my right temple an immediate toothache & my jaw just feeling like it was going to lock up. Once your head gets used the the pressure in about 15 to 20 min it kinda seems to go away but honestly I would not even know how to describe this to anyone. It really truly is something that you would have to experience to understand ( not that I want any of my friends to experience this ).

    As I am sitting in the wheelchair waiting to be taken to the next waiting area they wheel a gentleman past me who gets to start his treatment now. I look at him & smile & he smiles back & says "this is a good time isn't it?" I smile back & say "oh yeah!" I can tell that this is his 1st time doing this & that he was very nervous. His wife is right behind him & she stops to talk to me. You can also see in her eyes how close she is to tears. I really wanted to stand up & just hug her & say its going to be okay-- the worst part of this is over now--but I chose to stay seated in the wheelchair. She puts her hand on mine & asks me a few questions. I am trying to answer her while hoping to make her feel more comfortable with this whole situation. She pats my hand & thanks me for the honesty. I wish her & her husband the best of luck & she follows to catch up to her husband. As she walks away I couldn't help to think how lucky I am to have so many wonderful people that I have in my life that are here to support me & how much I want to give that support back to others so they also feel the same in their time of need.
     Now I have spent a wonderful weekend in Pacifica with Brenda & the boys. Thank you Brenda for letting us tag along with you this weekend & meet your awesome man child. It's so wonderful to sit & watch my kids run & just play in the sand & water & for me I just feel at such peace with my life & what's going on right now.