Don't be afraid

     I had an interesting incident this weekend. I ran into someone on Friday that I had always been friends with before cancer. This person saw me & chose to ignore me & go up to my other friends that I was with & talk to them. I started feeling really bad... I kept thinking what the heck, we have always been friends what is the issue here? Did I do something to upset him? Did I ever say anything to offend him? I didn't understand what was wrong. So after much discussion with my girlfriends about this issue I confronted my friend to find out what the problem really was. It seemed that he just didn't know what to say to me anymore. He had felt that he needed to fix things & this was out of his control to fix & then he just didn't know what to say anymore. I told him that he was right he couldn't fix this but really what I needed most from him was his friendship. He understood how I felt but he wasn't sure what we could talk about now. I said to him that we can talk about everything we talked about before cancer. I don't want to talk about the cancer all the time. I want to sometimes feel that I am normal just like everyone else. This ended up being a great night with my friend & i am so thankful that I was able to have this talk with him.
  So why am I posting or talking about this incident? I have heard many people say that they feel uncomfortable around friends or family with cancer & they, just like my friend, don't know how they can help or even what to say to them anymore. This is how I feel about that.... I need my friends & family the most right now!! Sometimes there isn't anything that you can do but a quick text saying I love or I am thinking about you means the world to someone. Sometimes I don't always want people around but it sure is nice to know that no matter how bad I feel I still have them behind me supporting me. If you have been friends with someone for a long time you always have lots to talk about. Me personally, I would much rather hear what is going on with your life then even think about what I am dealing with in mine. I love to be able to help my friends & family by just listening to them when ever I can. They have done so much for me let me feel like I can give back a little too!