My children......

  I saw something this week that really made me stop & think about my kids. When I really sat & thought about it I began to feel so very sad for them or maybe even me. Here's what I saw

Now for those of you that really know me you know that I have never sat back & said poor me or boo hoo I have cancer but when I saw this I starting thinking about my kids & how far was I going to be able to make it into this process above. Lets see Bladen is 22 so can I make until he is 25 & then maybe I might be right in his eyes or my sweet little Colby boy he is now 8 & not even on this as of yet. Then I look down at 50 & think why is it that my kids need to even be thinking about this already. When I was 32 I lost my mom & I thought I was so young to be losing my mother & never did I think that my kids might lose theirs before that age. Now don't think that I have even given up my fight with Cancer but I also know that I need to be realistic & I need to get my stuff together. When I saw this it really made me decide that I want to do whatever I could for my kids while I can. I won't be around in 20 years to do all the things that everyone else might get to do so why fault me for wanting to do everything that I can for them now? I don't know that I will ever see any of my children get married & with that I don't think that I will ever get to see my grandchildren here on earth. Does this make me sad.... Sure it does but I worry more for my children then me. My children are the very best part of me & I love them with all my heart!